WHAT TO DO AFTER HIGH-SCHOOL?

I joined university about seven months ago, so I thought I`d share some tips/advices with you guys! I thought I knew what it`d be like to join the university, but I was taken by surprise and that`s why the first semester was a little hard for me. Here in Norway we have something called “university college” – I know some people only call it “college”, but basically it`s not exactly a university. Anywho, I believe at least some of these advices can be noted down by all students out there SO here are some things I wish someone had told me last year. Also, sorry I didn`t post this yesterday – I slept 3 hours two days ago, so I had to catch up on some sleep. But better late than never, right?


First things first – University isn`t like high-School. “Oh, wow, what a surprise – NOT” you might be thinking, but for someone like me so many people are way too many people, haha. I went from seeing perhaps 50-75 people in high-School to seeing more than 200 people every day. Perhaps even more than that. The thing is – a university is not “personal”. There are people everywhere, doing their own thing and I find that both a negative and a positive thing. When I joined high-School, everything was so new the first month, but after that I felt like Nannestad became “my place”, if you know what I mean? I don`t think that`s ever going to happen at the university, haha… I think it`s important to know that university won`t be like high-school at all. My greatest advice for you will be to visit universities whenever they`re having “open days” for high-school students or people who`re considering joining a university soon. Ask the professors as much as you want to – don`t be scared. No questions are stupid questions – they`ve been students theirselves, so they know a lot. You`re new to this. I don`t know if other universities have those, but we had small lectures so we could get a little taste of what the course`s like and what we`ll learn. Do as much as you to find out what you can do and talk with people who know what they`re talking about.

For a long time I had an idea about what I wanted to do in life. I`ve always wanted to help people, but as I became more socially engaged, I became more aware of my interests and what topics attract me. So, last year I realised I find different societies, cultures and human beings interested. I wanted to find more about how people think, I wanted to seek knowledge about different ways of living and understanding the world. I had and still have SO MANY interests that I don`t know where to begin, so when I finally applied, my list included various courses: sociology, social anthropology, history, philosophy, psychology.. All ending with “y”, haha. Anywho, for a long time I was standing between sociology and social anthropology, as it was hard to tell the difference between these two, but as you might know, I ended up with social anthropology. I did a lot of research, talked with people and called the university because I wanted to be sure about what I`wanted to do. Maybe that had something to do with my wish to not waste any time and go for exactly wanted I wanted, instead of being insecure and just see if it was something for me. If you`re not like me when it comes to that, then it`s alright, but no matter what you do: Do what YOU want to do because YOU want to go for it. I recommend you to do a lot of research online. Know what you can do, what opportunities you have. I had no idea I had the option to study the democrazy, hindi or criminality. So please do a lot of research, because in case you haven`t found your dream course – who knows, it might exist without you not even knowing?

If I end up doing a master in social anthropology, I`ll end up with the title “anthropologist”. Many don`t know what exactly an anthropologist can do and to be honest, I had no idea either. But, now I know better. You can be a professor, a teacher, a researcher, a councelor, a journalist. Or you can work in different organisations such as Amnesty. Some people have told me that I won`t get a job with a degree in anthropology, but I just think that people should chill. Way too many people are worried about money, the future and jobs – I believe people should be more worried about their dreams, hopes and wishes. Worry more about the knowledge you`re seeking. In today`s world there`s not really a road which is “straight forward”. Most people know that a PhD in medicine gives a person the title “doctor” and most people know what a doctor does. But with many other courses, especially social sciences, it`s not that easy. As a therapist you can end up at a place you never had imagined. The same goes for sociologist, anthropologists. When I visited the university, I met a woman who had a master degree in history. I thought she was working as a researcher, or maybe as a teacher. I was therefore taken by surprise when she told me she was working with TV. She was offered a job, which included that. So the lesson is – it`s natural to worry and think of it, of course it is. But not let it worry you that much, that it stops you from doing what you want to do. In today`s society you don`t really know where you`ll end up in the market and you don`t know what doors will open up for you. The key is to be open-minded and chase your dreams – the rest will settle down on its own.

I`ve given you some advices now, but no matter what you do – the greatest advice of them all is: Follow your heart, not your brain. Thinking “Oh, I`ll become a doctor, because I`ll earn so much money then”, might give you money, but it won`t give you a long-lasting happiness. It won`t give you that good feeling every morning, when you wake up and have to get ready for a new day at work. Reflect not only upon the future, but now. Reflect upon what you want to learn and what you can do with that knowledge. Education isn`t only education and a safer way to get a job – it`s knowledge. Learn what you want to learn, do what you want to do and make the world a better place.

Good luck. large (24).jpg

PS: If you have any questions – do leave a comment below and I`ll answer.

JUST ANOTHER WEDNESDAY

Posting yesterday was hard, but it was worth it. Writing down my feelings and thoughts have always helped me and I`m so glad God gave me thhe ability to do exactly that. Thanks to everyone who read my post – if you haven`t read it yet, you can HERE.

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Today`s been another Wednesday and I`ve spent most of the day correcting and reading through my assignment. Tomorrow is the deadline for the exam in philosophy, and I can`t wait to shrug off this burden.

I`m going to go back to work now, maybe I have to stay up tonight to be satisfied with it. We`ll see, we`ll see. Tomorrow I`ll post a blogpost about picking what to do after high-school, advices and what you should do if you`re about to graduate and don`t exactly know what to do. Or for you whom have no idea how to think of the future. 🙂 Stay tuned!

The 16th of December

Thursday, 15th of December

My mum tells me I have to meet a lady, who`s going to hand me something she needs. Since I have the day off, I decide to meet her between two and three o clock.

 

Friday, 16th of December

It`s not a cold day at all. I`m sitting on my laptop, completely unaware of everything. Some minutes later I have to get ready, to meet this lady. I realise I have to buy a new ticket for a new month. I`ll need it, even though I`m on my holidays, to meet my grandmother in the hospital the next four weeks. 2.30 PM I`m on my way to the train station. I catch the train and go off two stations later, where I`m going to meet this woman.

She messages me. She`s 10 mins late. Alright, I text back. Another message. She`s 20 mins late. Okay, I reply. 30 mins late. 40 mins late. I don`t reply. She`ll come when she comes, I think.

I`m sitting on this bench inside the train station. People pass by every minute. They all seem busy and they`re all going somewhere. It`s just another Friday. Kids are on their way home – they must be glad. It`s weekend. My mum calls me and I pick up the phone, just like usual.

“Hey, where are you?”

“Hey, I`m here, waiting for that lady”.

“Oh, okay”. Silence. An uncomfortable, torturing silence follows. “Why are you asking?”, I say.

“Just like that”.

The torturing silence is there, once again. Since it`s so wearisome, I ask her one more time what it is.

“Grandmother died.”

I heard her, but I didn`t understand what she was saying. I`m shocked and I can`t believe it.

“Huh?”

“Grandmother died”, she repeates. She keeps talking, but I have no idea what she`s saying and frankly it doesn`t matter.

“Ok.”

That`s all I had to say. I cut the call, put the phone back in my pocket. I start crying. In front of people. I don`t know what to do, I don`t know what to say, I don`t know how to react. I want to run to the hospital as fast as I can.

It`s not “ok” at all.

The woman sends me another message. “I`m so sorry I`m late, I`m just not really having a good day”.

I don`t reply. We`re both not having good days, I think to myself. There`s something about this Friday. I thank God when she finally arrives, I act like nothing and rush to the bus station. I`m on my way to see her. This is the last day, the last time I`m ever going to see her.

Maybe I bought that new travel card just to see her dead.

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TODAY WAS GOOD

Today`s actually been a good day – I can`t even remember the last time I felt like this. I slept about two hours tonight and I`m still doing just fine. I`m telling myself to do the same tonight, but hehe, my body was all like “SLEEP, ANNE!” last night so the plan is to be in bed way earlier tonight. 🙂

Well, why was today good? I don`t really know. Maybe because I worked so hard with my semester assignment last night and the teacher liked it? I`m not done yet, but we had a short meeting today where he read through it and gave me feedback. I felt like I was kind of back in secondary school, where JK used to read through our drafts sometimes and give us feedback. Do I need to mention I miss those days? Apart from that.. nothing special happened. I went to school, worked with my assignment, had a lecture, worked some more, had the meeting and then went home. Pretty much the same old, so I don`t know what exactly it is, but you know what? I`m just glad I`m finally feeling alright for once. Feels good to actually end the day with a smile 🙂

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NOW I`m going to sleep – can`t wait to get in my comfy bed. I know I haven`t really been blogging much lately, but I`m going to try to update you more from today of. Good night!

LOVE YOURSELF

Today`s Valentines Day or, if you`re like me – just another Tuesday.

I understand that today`s a little more special. It`s supposed to be all about love, but so many places I`ve read things like “like this if you`re single too on Valentines Day” and “today sucks because I`m single”. WHEN did Valentines Day become a day for only those of us who are in a relationship? I mean, you don`t have to be in a relationship to celebrate love.

I wish especially women stopped believing that they need a man next to them in order to feel good. It`s great to have a person who`s always there for you, who makes you smile and happy and who sends you cute messages every morning. But, what matters the most is that YOU love YOURSELF. Someone might love you, but you`ll never be 100 % happy until you`re happy with yourself, until you accept your flaws and mistakes and love yourself. Boys and girls might come and go, but you`ll always have yourself at the end of the day. Who cares if you`re not in a relationship today? Things will happen at the right time and until then, we should treat ourselves right. We should love ourselves. Celebrating love is awesome and frankly, we should do that every day. But, considering that it`s Valentines Day today – if you don`t have anyone to celebrate it with, then celebrate it with yourself.

So today? Today I`m thinking about all the things I`ve done that I`m proud of, I`m thinking of the journey I`ve had so far and how I`m so proud of who I`ve become. I`m thinking about how I would`nt have been where I am today if I hadn`t loved myself when I needed love the most. Today I`m loving myself.

Why, you might ask.

Well, it`s simple. One day I might not have anyone by my side, but the one thing I know for sure is that I`ll always have myself at the end of the day.

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WHEN YOU ARE MORTAL

For several years I`ve been that kind of person who`s afraid the time on this earth won`t be enough. For not having enough time. I`m scared of dying without being given any warnings. One would believe I`m way too anxious about time running out.

Something happened when I was little. I don`t remember whether I was eight or nine-year-old, but that doesn`t really mater. Suddenly an evening I wasn`t willing to sleep. I didn`t want to sleep. I shouted, I cried. Why? I was, for some reason, afraid to die. I didn`t want to die. Not to forget, I was sad about the fact that I one day have to leave my family. After some days it was all over – I didn`t cry myself to sleep and slept better. But my way of thinking about life and death still exists, as we speak.

I struggle with not having enough time. I can be in my room, watching this Indian serial and start thinking that`s pointless, even though a person needs to relax once in a while. I can be on the train on my way home and for a while believe everything I`m doing, is meaningless. I can do something I believe is good, and still believe it`s pointless.

I`m too frightened to not be able to wake up one day. There have been nights where I`ve been lying awake, because I`ve been thinking “what am I to do if I don`t wake tomorrow?” “What do I do if someone comes and kills me while I`m asleep?” One would believe it`s a crisis if I don`t wake up the next morning, which it actually is. I`m way too scared about not having enough time in this life.

Some days ago my grandmother was diagnosed with cancer. My uncle was diagnosed with the same about two years ago. When such circumstances occur in people`s lives, it`s quite normal to be in shock and start realising things. Some days ago I was reminded a houndred times at once that this life will be over one day. Or that I might be the one, one day, who`s admitted into the hospital and has cancer. That`s why I don`t have much time. I have to write a book, I have to finish my education, I have to help people, I have to travel, I have to meet people, I have to be independent, free and a kind human being. Time`s running out and that`s why I get way too stressed sometimes. What if I die at the age of 40 and haven`t been able to do everything I want to do? I`m most likely going to lie in the grave and have depression then.

Because when I`m on my way to catch the train every morning, it`s after all alright if I miss it and get late, because I can always catch the next one. But what do you do when your time on this earth is coming to an end? Life`s not timeless. It`s a gift you only get once. It`s a train you only have the option to catch one time and go off one time. There`s no next train and to be honest that makes me very upset.40c952630cb28566ab459ea708202144

This is a text I wrote for the anthropological journal “Antropress” in November. Proud to be the only one to have written something personal. 

BACK TO UNI

Okay, let`s for once be honest.

I went back to uni yesterday and not really communicating with anyone has been just fine.

Why, you might ask?

I don`t know what to say to people there. I don`t know how I`m supposed to act “normal” anymore. It`s easier through Facebook – I don`t have to face the person. But in real life not much makes sense anymore.

And don`t get me wrong – I don`t have any friends at uni yet. It`s maybe kind of my fault, because my social life was the last thing I thought of while my grandmother was alive. I used to finish school, visit her at the hospital and plan my days according to her. But, I must confess that it took time for me to call Sara and Thea my friends and it`ll take at least some months for me to call my fellow students for my friends. That`s just how I am and I prefer knowing who I`m allowing to stay in my life because I`ve been hurt too many times before.

Anywho, the point is – I don`t know what I`m supposed to say to them. “Um, hey, yeah, my holiday was perfect and I`m happy to be back.” Damn, life`s so weird – I feel like I was so me, I was so normal before my grandmother died and now I just don`t know anymore. Just writing the word grandmother brings tears to my eyes – what am I to do? God. And tomorrow I`m going to meet my study group to discuss some of the syllabus and I have we only talk about what`s in the books.

I`m taking my time with this – I think about her as much as I want to, I cry as much as I want to and I want to “stay away” from most people for a while. Not because I hate them or have anything against them – I just don`t know what to say. I guess that`s the case here on my blog too – I only want to talk about what happened the past three months and death and I bet none of you really is interested in that. As if I`ve never talked about any of that here.

In the end I`d like to thank everyone who`ve sent me condolences and sweet words the past month and especially a big thanks to Sara who came to visit me while I was taking care of my cousins. ♥

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