I want to be honest with you guys.

I received a lot of support from people all over the country after my article. I was surprised and wasn`t that much bothered by the mean comments. I know how to answer back and people laughed at my comments because let`s face it – my replies can be very sharp.

But weeks have passed and first of all РI haven`t received much support from my Muslim friends. Perhaps because their parents would say something. Maybe because they think I`m wrong and are too much of cowards to say that straight to me. One of my Muslim friends on Facebook shared my article and commented it, which meant a lot. But apart from her Рwhere is everyone else? It`s not only about the article Рwhen my uncle died, most of those who say they care weren`t there for me. My mum`s friends didn`t bother visiting us and it made me very upset. At my birthday nobody even bothers doing anything special for me. It makes me wonder Рdo people even care, what do they think of me and what I do, what do they want from me, what can I expect from them?

I have Sara and Thea and I feel so lucky to have them, but I`m thinking of all those whom claim that they care but barely show it. I miss those other people whom I once considered as my friends or people whom cared about me. I`ve met way more people in my life than Sara and Thea. I`m so tired of explaining it – if you care, you show so. If you say you care, but don`t show so, you don`t know the true meaning behind the words “I care.” I “only” want more people to care, I want people to actually be true and honest with me. If you don`t want me in your life – let me know instead of keeping me in the dark. I`m so tired – I give so much and barely get anything in return. I give so much of myself to people, I trust them and try my best to keep them happy – but what about me?

It feels like I`m the only one who`d visit my friend who`s in the psychiatry. Or who`d be there for someone who`ve lost someone I don`t know. It feels like I`m the only one who bothers messaging someone who just ends up never replying afterwards. People say they`re too busy, yet they have time to be on Facebook 2 am at night. Perhaps to talk to someone who`s much better than me.

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