Once a person asked me if I`m affected by the bullying or not. Why? Maybe because I`ve been so open about everything at such an early “stage”. I feel like people look at me as a very strong woman, but it`s easy to forget that it took a lot for me to get where I am today. It`s not like I never cried. In fact, I cried myself to sleep a lot. I came home many days, all angry and told everyone in the house that next day? Next day I`ll have my revenge. And so I did. Not the next day or the next week or the next month – but eventually.
The truth is – the bullying did affect me. To be honest, it affects everyone. Some people end up commiting suicide because they`re bullied, some learn what they don`t want to be like to other people. The bullying did affect me. Maybe it made me vulnerable, but one thing it for sure taught me was how horrible it is to be treated that way and that I never in a million years can allow myself to treat someone like that. The bullying made me stronger, but that doesn`t mean I never cried. It gave me something to fight for. That doesn`t mean I never broke down, that doesn`t mean I never had enough. And it for sure doesn`t mean that I allowed the bullies to treat me the way they did. I think it`s easy for people to believe that the people who smile the brighters have no scars, when the truth is, we`ve been through a lot too. So has your neighbour, so has your teacher, so has Obama – you get it. All of us have baggage with us, we all have scars that most of us try to hide away – what I did was to not keep some of them to myself anymore. I wanted to share my “story” with everyone, and so I did. Just because I`m smiling in a picture in the newspaper doesn`t mean the bullying didn`t do anything to me. It tore me apart for some time, it made me believe no one was there for me for some time and I felt so hopeless. I`ve been there too and I`m sure many others have too.
I still think of what happened sometimes, which I think is natural to do. Bullying does that to you sometimes. Also, I was bullied pretty much half of my life, so of course it affected me. I still think of what they used to say to me and I may shed one or two tears, but that`s pretty much it. It doesn`t bother me more than that anymore, because I`ve gotten over it. The hopeless feeling isn`t there anymore, but it used to be there once upon a time. It did affect me negatively, but I don`t believe that`s the case anymore – now I use that time as my strength. I want to inspire people and use those awful experiences to something good and worthy.
I think being bullied would make anyone sad. It`s not something I want anyone to go through, but the case it completely different – right now someone`s being bullied. Maybe you who`re reading this, has or is being bullied. And I want to tell you that the bullying will affect you, but it`s up to you how you`re going to let it affect you. It`s bound to affect you, but it`s up to YOU whether you let these bullies take over your life or not. It`s up to you whether you want to rise up from the ground and or stay there whenever you fall down. Hopefully you decide to rise like a skyscraper. Just like I did.