SPRING & TOO NERVOUS

Spring. There`s something else about spring when you`ve been through a cold winter. I don`t know if I can call it a long winter, I`m not sure if I know what a long winter is anymore. The snow showed up, then melted away and then decided to show up again. Up and down, just like life. But I know that spring is forreal here now and it was nice to sit in front of the house, on the stairs and have some yummy pasta while the neighbours` dog was barking. Literally.

Wearing my sunglasses, boots and my coat makes me more happy than you`ll realise. There`s just something about an outfit which include them. I thought today that maybe I should put away the boots soon and use them again in September, but then thought neh, I like them too much.

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I was too nervous before the seminar today, because I didn`t know what people thought but what for?? It went so well, people gave me constructive feedback and I`m excited to get cracked on the writing tomorrow morning. I think we worry too much sometimes. Students tend to worry too much about what could possibly go wrong, but if something can go wrong it could also go right. Today before the seminar I thought “okay, if what I wrote was that bad, then they will tell me, what`s so bad about that, I`ll just have a lot of improvements to do on my text”. Perhaps I was thinking that way because what I write means something to me. Oh, well, I worried for nothing and it all went fine. I know this might not help, but if you`re on your way to an exam and are super nervous, try to think that it`s not the end of the world. That sounds super dramatical, but it is usually true. 😉 It`s so easy to get caught up in your head, to overthink everythink, but many times that`s what it is – overthinking.

Tomorrow I`m meeting the teacher to get individual feedback and I want to get up early, so I`m off to bed soon. Hope you are having an amazing day. 🖤

A TUESDAY LIST

🖤 Last week I went to this job related event and on my way home, I missed the train. I had to wait for the next one and guess who I met meanwhile? Sara! I`m the kind of person who ends up believing I missed a bus or a train for a reason, because way too many times that has happened just for me to meet someone I haven`t met in a while. This time it was Sara and she is such a lovely girl! I`m glad Thea, Sara and I are still friends. Honestly, I don`t think there`s anything bad in them, they would never hurt anyone. And I`m not saying that because they`re my friends, I genuinly mean that. By the way, her mum was with her and she looked so young, so I managed to ask “who is this?” even though I`ve met her before, haha.

🖤 In about twenty days I`ll finish this semester, which is making me feel kind of stressed. I don`t want to stay at home and stare at the roof more or less four months. I`m applying for jobs here and there, while writing my bachelor essay. If I don`t have a job for this summer by the end of this month, I`ll apply for as many jobs as possible. I really want to travel and I need money for that, so.

🖤 It`s crazy to think that I`ll finish my bachelor degree this semester. Well, almost. I feel like I should feel older than I feel like. I mean, I almost have a degree already, like what???

🖤 Although I kind of have a two/three years long plan for my life, I feel like I have no idea what I want to do with my life. Sara was asking me the other day when I met her what I want to do, and I don`t know. I know that I want to write and I know that I want to help people, but I`m not sure how. Maybe because quite a lot of doors are open with a degree in social anthropology and people end up doing so many different things. It`s exciting, but nerve-wrecking to not know where I will end up.

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🖤 Sometimes it`s hard to know what photos to put in a post. I`m an anonymous blogger and whereas many would pick a photo of themselves or even a selfie, I feel like I tend to put a photo I`ve taken quickly while I`ve been out, but words are more important to me and I hope that`s the case for those of you who choose to read my blog.

🖤 It seems like I`ve accepted that I won`t be able to finish my bachelor this semester. It`s weird how we just accept some situations sometimes, when we know we can`t do much about it. I did a mistake, I`ve learned from it and I am moving on, which is the best for me. It sucks, of course, but what can I do.

🖤 I sent what I`ve written so far of my bachelor essay to the teacher today and WHY am I so nervous. It`s my time to present my research question and essay and I wonder what people will think. It`s nowhere finished, I still have quite a lot of work to do. I just hope I get some advices on what I should improve and add. We`re all also meeting the teacher this week to get individual feedback, which I`m also nervous about. But it will be fine!!

Now I`m off to bed, tomorrow`s going to be a good day. Talk to you tomorrow!

MORE OF THAT

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I think it`s important to do something different once in a while. In my life that means socializing. It`s quite easy to just stay at the university, but it`s important to get out and also get to know your fellow students. I and another girl who studies with me were talking about that the other day. We were both on an exchange semester last semester; I was in the Netherlands and she was in Scottland in the UK. We both were like “we`ve made more friends and been more social the semester we spent away than the two years we`ve spent studying here in Oslo”, haha… Too true. Should I say sadly? Anyways, I want to try to be more social, at least. About two weeks ago I went to this breakfast they had, which was interesting. Today they were arranging a walk at Sognsvann, a nice nature place in Oslo. It was quite nice, we did some walking and then we sat down, talked, had a campfire and did a quiz. Reminds me of the old days. 🙂

I felt a bit like an “oldie” because everyone else was a first-year or a second-year, and I`m on my third-year and could tell them about all the courses and what they were like. Kind of like an expert, hehe. Some of them are also going on an exchange semester, which makes me so happy!! MORE OF THAT, YASS. If I could, I would so do it again.

And no, winter isn`t back. At least I hope it isn`t. There was still some snow left at Sognsvann, hence the snow in the pictures. Spring has come and I believe it is here to stay this time.

1/2 DONE

WOO, I`m done with the re-sit of the exam. I`m satisfied with what I wrote, but the bibliography, though… I should stop writing it at the end . Hopefully the teacher will be nice and give me a pass this time.

Now I have my bachelor essay left and then I`m done with this semester. I really hope I`ll be able to find and interview two people this week, so I can write as much as possible and hand in something I`m okay with. The more, the better, because I`ll get more feedback and those reading will be able to tell where my essay is going or not. Just a few weeks now and I`m done with this semester. Craaaaazy.Processed with VSCO with f2 presetProcessed with VSCO with f2 preset

I woke up early and had an intense long study session. You know when you`ve been working on something for hours and you finally hand it in? Haha, I feel so free then, as if I suddenly have all the time in the world and can “go back” to life. Oh, a really good tips, by the way. I used the “pomodoro technique” yesterday and today when working, and it`s so good?? I`m surprised. It`s basically a technique you can use while doing work, whether it`s studies or just anything you`ve got to do. You have 25 minutes of full focus, 5 munutes break, another 25 minutes of full focus and it goes on. After four or five sessions you can have a longer break. Honestly, I think we`re not really able to maintain a good focus for two hours, and 25 minutes really isn`t much. You`re more focused for a longer period of time and it`s been really helpful for me. Especially during my first semester, I would try to sit down to get some reading done and I felt like the two hours was literally never going to pass, but with the pomodore technique you don`t really realise where the time goes. I`m definitely going to be using this the rest of the month, as I believe it works for me. Just a small tip!

Now I`m going to the shop. I need some fresh air. Have a lovely evening, guys! ✨

ALLOW ME TO SAY THIS

First of all, thanks to everyone who reads my blog and thanks to those of you who leave nice comments. I appreciate it. When I woke up today, I thought “maybe I shouldn`t have written a post about how I`m struggling with this exam” BUT then I thought “what even, that`s how it is and that`s how so many students feel, even though it might not always look like that.” I feel better about it today, though, I sat down and planned my essay. One tip: read short academic articles if you want insight in how to write one. That has helped me, even though not all academic articles follow the guidelines we are told to follow by the teachers. I wonder if they realise that.

I know people who have more to do than me this semester, but I`m going to allow myself to say this: I can`t wait to finish this exam and my bachelor essay. Or I take that back, because at least I have something to do. I just hope I get a job, because then I get to travel this summer or during the autumn. And if I don`t get a job for some sad reasons: please send me a flight ticket to Amsterdam. (and yes, I know I was there four times during my exchange semester, but you simply can`t get enough of such an amazing city).

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Soon it`s time for dinner and after that I need to work work work work work. I better be productive tonight.

MY ALL-TIME FAVOURITE CITY? HOW MUCH DO I TRUST PEOPLE?

All these questions are taken from here. (link). 

Are you more likely to avoid conflict or engage it head-on? It depends, but if someone`s being treated in an unfair way, I can`t help but feel it so much. Unjustice is not something I can just watch happen right in front of me. I think it`s important to not create unnecessary conflicts in life, but I also think it`s important to be able to engage in a conflict when it`s needed.

Do you have a whole lot of acquaintances or just a few very close friends? Why? I have a few close friends. Sometimes I catch myself wishing I had more friends, but then I realise that I just got so many new friends in Maastricht. I miss them. Weird how we`re all back home now and doing our own thing. Why I have a few close friends? That`s kind of what it has been like the past few years. I guess you could say it`s because of things that have happened in the past? I don`t know, it just feels that way. At the same time I think it`s better to have friends whom you actually really know, instead of having a lot whom you don`t know where are at.

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What’s your all-time favourite town or city? Why?

AMSTERDAM!! I was there four times during my exchange semester and I can`t wait to go back soon. Next time I want to have more days in the beautiful city. The streets, the canals, the roads, the atmosphere. I wanted to visit Amsterdam so badly for years and I finally got to summer 2017. I was super excited and it`s odd to think that I`ve spent some time there five times by now. I waited so long and within two years I`ve already been there so many times. I`m glad that Amsterdam isn`t that far away. Ah, a big reason why I want to work so badly this summer is that I want to get away from here again and just the idea of travelling makes me so happy. My exchange semester definitely made me more addicted to travelling.

How difficult is it for you to forgive someone who refuses to apologize?

It`s not difficult. I don`t know if this is going to make sense, but I don`t feel like I “have” to forgive someone because I`ve “already” done it. I don`t get so mad or angry at someone that it gets to that point, but I feel very disappointed, frustrated, sad and let down. It is even more frustrating when the person in front of you doesn`t ackownledge that they might have hurted me or doesn`t even want to listen. On the other hand: an apologize isn`t always enough, for me actions speak louder than words.

To what extent do you trust people?

At the end of the day: quite little. It`s not that I`m not nice to people or that I never believe what they say, but at the end of the day I get quite sceptical to people and wonder what their true intentions are and if they realise how much harm little things also can do. I keep believing in the good in people, but trusting has become too difficult.

 What do you think about more than anything else?

Right now? My future. I wonder what it will be like, what my career will look like, who I will be friends with  and what my situation in general will be like. Sometimes it worries me, sometimes it excites me.

MY DAY THROUGH PICTURES

Monday and a new week! The days are passing by so fast. Since I don`t have as much work as I thought I would have two months ago, I tend to keep telling myself that I have quite a lot of time but we`re already half way through March. I got up ca. 06.30 today (still haven`t managed to get up 5 o clock, haha) and was on the train an hour later. I went to the library to return two books and get some work done, but I didn`t get anything done and went back home.

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My outfit today and many other days. All black. I bought these trouses in the Netherlands and really like them. The sweater is also from there, I have the same one in two other colours. And I just noticed that that mirror needs to be cleaned, haha.Processed with VSCO with c1 preset

On my way home I went to the shop to buy a few things, because they were having a sale. A tip if you want to save money: buy a lot of stuff the weeks the supermarkets or grocery stores have sales. We do that and then have certain foodproducts for longer. This time I particularly wanted to buy a lot of spinach, pineapple and garlic baguette (they`re so good!!) and as you can tell, I got quite a lot of spinach. I use it in my smoothies!Processed with VSCO with f2 preset

Something else that didn`t make me that happy, was this. I mean… do the shops even want to make people stop throwing so much food? And can someone please tell me what the point of throwing fresh and clean bread slices is?? Processed with VSCO with c1 presetProcessed with VSCO with g3 preset

I barely spent fifteen minutes at home before I caught the bus to Sørumsand to try and get some studying done then. I got a little done, but clearly I wasn`t that motivated to get things done today. Annoying, but hopefully tomorrow. Processed with VSCO with c1 preset

That`s pretty much my day in pictures, but something that has been on my mind a lot today which these pictures can`t show, is everything that has been going on in Utrecht. It`s weird, but I feel that the shooting there for some reason is so much closer. Most likely because it`s not long ago since I was in the country and I have lived there for about months. Plus I have some friends who live there. This happened only three days after the attacks in New Zealand. Ah, what to say… I`m sorry for the lives lost and for everyone involved. It`s really sad how things like this keep happening.