Exactly one year ago today my dear grandfather left this world.
The circumstances it all happened in still leave me shocked. Two days before my flight, I woke up and wanted to tell my mum that I wanted to go. She was stressed, getting ready for her flight which was later that day. I knew I was going to start crying, because I really wanted to go. I was going on a hike with the Red cross team later that Saturday. Before that my mum thankfully bought a ticket for me and my flight was two days later. A few moments later my mum found out that my Pakistani passport had expired. I was already out then and got worried, but didn`t realise the seriousness until I got home and my mum was on the plane. The embassy was closed, but thanks to my Dad I got an urgent visa. Meanwhile my mum had moved my ticket to Thursday, but when I got my urgent visa I wanted to move it. Which I did.
Thank God I did that. It gave me the chance to see you one last time.
I still can`t believe my grandfather died. I can`t believe that he`s never going to call my mum again. One of my favourite memories of him, is when my mum went to Pakistan last year and he asked her before she left “won`t you bring any guavas with you for Iqra?” He knew I really like him. He was always so calm, the only time I can remember him being a bit angry was when he was defending his grandchild, haha. My dear grandfather. You would always ask your daughter how I was doing, when you`re talk on the phone. My mum would many times stress that she hadn`t talked to you for some days. She hasn`t done that in a year. I would figure out what the time was in Pakistan and say “call him, he might be awake”. When I was in Pakistan in 2014, I would hear noises from the livingroom 6 am in the morning while I was sleeping and I would be too annoyed. Who woke up super early in the morning? You did. I don`t think you ever missed a prayer. I wish I had gotten up earlier, though. To just sit in the livingroom with you. I remember how happy you were when I visited you summer 2015. It was only for a few days, but I`m so glad I got those few days with you. They turned out to be some of the last days I would ever get to spend with you.
I`m sorry I didn`t get to spend as much time with you as I wish I had, you were far away and I was far away. I`m sorry you had to leave so early, but I really hope you were happy that I came, even if it was during one of the last moments. I think of you more than I express, but I hope you know that I do think of you and I pray for you.
I`ll always miss hearing your voice on the phone, though.