Something I wrote a while ago.
People who know me, know how fascinated I am by Anne Frank and her story. I`ve read several books of her, I know when she wrote in her diary and not, some years ago I planned what places I`m going to go to that Anne herself had been to and after several years, I don`t get bored by her diary. Give me her diary and you won`t hear me say anything for hours.
I found out about her when I was 10-11 years old. I believe it was because of a book my brother borrowed from the library – it`s called “Who was Anne Frank?” I read it, and started looking for her diary. I remember sitting next to my desk in sixth grade, and suddenly my eyes noticed the bookshelf next to the teacher`s desk. There was something about it. My eyes looked through the book`s titles from distance, and that`s when I found it. Her diary. I went to the bookcase, took out the book and borrowed it.
Ever since then I`ve borrowed it and read it a million times. Last time I did so, was in May. I had to borrow to copies – one is from 1995 and the other one is from 2012. I just can`t get enough. I`ve read a lot about her, about her family and her diary. I`ve been that obsessed, that I at one point wanted to write just like her, and started studying her handwriting. God, if you guys only knew. Her story fascinates me so much and she reminds me of myself. Her stubbornness, her willpower and her love for reading and writing. I write a diary, I also love history and want to become a journalist or writer one day. Her story thrills me and inspires me. She was full of hope and despite everything, she kept clinging onto her dreams and wishes.
Ever since I got to know her, I`ve been wanting to visit Prinsengracht 263. I`ve been wanting to go to Amsterdam and find out where she used to be. However, I had to wait for several reasons. I had to wait for several years. At times I was so impatient that it was almost unbearable. I became less impatient, when I went to four of the concentration camps in 2012 and for a second time went to Sachsenhausen in 2015. I know that might sound odd, as I went to Auschwitz, which is where Anne and the seven people who hid with her in her Dad`s office were brought by the Nazis from Westerbork. Which is where Anne saw her Dad for the very last time. Let`s say being there made me relax a little more when it came to my dreams. My main goal was to visit Amsterdam and the “Achterhuis”, but on the list you can find the names of the camps too. I`ve always been interested in the second world war, so seeing the reality that surrounded millions of people in the 1930s and 1940s, was important to me.
I`ve had to wait for this dream to come true for so many years. I remember a conversation I had with my friends some time ago. Somehow we ended up talking about my dream of going to Amsterdam. I started crying because I had been waiting for so long and there and then I didn`t have it in me to wait anymore. There`s no doubt some people in my life haven`t always valued my dreams, or considered them important. That has made me sad many times. Visiting Amsterdam and the Anne Frank House isn`t that hard either, as long as you have the money. It wasn`t a dream that I had to “work for”, I had to wait for a long time. Way too long, to be honest, but everything happens at the right time and now I can say that having to wait so long, made it even more mindblowing. It was about time and it was completely worth it.
I know what it`s like to have to wait so long for something to happen. I wasn`t allowed to go alone, so I even told my mum that I could catch a flight in the morning and be back in the evening, just so I could visit Prinsengracht and the Museum. You could say I sort of became desperate. I know what it`s like to wait, wait and wait. Sometimes it feels like it`s not going to happen, at least not anytime soon. You ask yourself when it`s going to be your turn, your time. It`s hard when the timing is wrong or your life circumstances don`t allow you to fulfill your dream right away or anytime soon, but it`s certainly harder when people you care about don`t believe your dream matters or don`t understand how important your dreams are.
When I finally went last week, I couldn`t believe it. I`m thankful for having the opportunity to finally go to the city and see the hiding place. I`m so grateful, you have no idea (thanks Mum, for the money, haha). Looking through the things we bought makes me so happy and makes me think of the time I spent in that wonderful city and in the Achterhuis.
It`s so important to have dreams in your life that make you burn on the inside. That make you feel like you have something to live for. That make you want to keep going. Have those kind of dreams, which motivate and inspire you. It`s even more important to keep on dreaming and not lose faith. You know what they say? Great things take time. Be patient, because things happen at the right place at the right time. Dream of things that mean something to you – that`ll be enough to keep you going. Chase your dreams. Always.