SHOULD I LAUGH OR CRY OR DO BOTH

I`m going to try and explain this as good as I can: so, I could apply for 3 exchange agreements on each faculty and 3 UiO (University in Oslo) agreements. On my list I had 12 agreements (basically most schools don`t have school fees, but some also have that so I had to write down some agreements twice). 5 of these agreements were UiO-agreements and apparentely, I`m not qualified for any of the universities I applied in India. I`m a little disappointed about that, to be honest, because after all I put India on the top. BUT it turns out that the mail I received yesterday, was talking about the UiO-agreements!! I didn`t know whether to laugh or cry when the woman in the office told me that, I got SO relieved. She also said that it looks like I`ve gotten an admission in the Netherlands, but I still don`t really know as I`ll get to know that tomorrow and on Friday (like I told you before).

AHHH, guys! I`m so happy. I wish I could go to India, but I`m happy as long as I get to go anywhere. Also, I`m still considering complaining, because it turns out that one of the agreements I applied for didn`t have any expectations when it comes to the grades and when I mentioned that to a woman today through e-mail she said “sorry, that information isn`t updated”. But isn`t that kind of stupid, considering that those of us who have applied, applied according to the information we found on the website? I mean, this is the university`s fault. Well well, we`ll see what happens about that. 🙂

I`m excited about tomorrow and Friday, because I`ll get to know where I`ve got in. I`m a little worried, because it turns out I applied for Maastricht first and not Amsterdam… God knows what I was thinking, but like someone of you said: God works it all out. 

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THEY SAY THAT GREAT THINGS TAKE TIME

I`m not popular, nor do I have many friends.

As a child I didn`t really have any friends. There and then I did I have people I could hang out with, but now I`ve realised they weren`t actually my friends. None of them stayed – some “faded away”, while others abandoned me. I was little, didn`t understand as much as I do now and didn`t really stand up for myself. In high-school I had many days where I felt lonely. For a long time, I didn`t really feel like anyone tried to listen to me or saw me who I am.

But, during my second year in high-school I got to know two girls, Sara and Thea. It started with me sitting with them. Slowly we started talking more and more and during third year I visited them and they visited me. I remember I once told them “I don`t trust you, it`s going to take a while for me” and they were like “well, just know that we trust you.” Some words can mean so much to you. They didn`t go all like “oh, why don`t you trust us, don`t you consider us your friends?”. They didn`t judge me, instead they gave me time and kept being the kind human beings they are. That meant and still means so much to me. I know that I could literally do anything to them, and they would still be kind to me. Thea is still here in Norway, while Sara is in Australia. She`s going to stay there for a couple of months and of course I miss her. I think it`s easy to think you`re going to drift apart when the distance is so huge, but I know we`re going to work it out and that missing each other will do us. Besides, Thea is still here!

Some days ago, Sara messaged me. “I just want to remind you of how fantastic, strong and cool you are, and I miss you.” Those words touched my heart and made me emotional (I`m perhaps the most emotional person on this earth).

I remember how I sometimes used to think before that the pain was never going to end. It seemed like the times I was going through at that time, was a phase I had to walk through forever. Many of us feel that way – it can feel like a never ending roller-coaster. You ask yourself “why me”. At that time I didn`t understand why people were being mean to me and making fun of me either. To be honest. sometimes I even found myself thinking “am I not cool enough or beautiful enough for people?” It feels like I wasn`t  popular or fabulous enough for most people, because after all, I didn`t really have that many to hang out with.

I still don`t have that many to hang out with, but you know what? I might have few friends, but the ones I have are fantastic. That`s good enough for me, because at least I`m cool enough, beautiful enough and fabulous enough for them. And that`s all that should matter.

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//Photo: here

THINGS THAT HAVE MADE ME HAPPY LATELY

✨ The things that I bought from Germany. I`ve finally got some knitted sweaters that I`ve been wearing quite a lot lately. Some of you might have seen the red ones. There are some that I haven`t tried yet, which I`m also very excited about.

✨ Speaking of Germany – I haven`t told you what happened on my way home from Germany. So, I only had hand baggage as luggage wasn`t included in my ticket. I knew very well it was too heavy, but I couldn`t leave some of my stuff in Germany, haha. But, a man stopped me while I was on my way to the plane. He said my suitcase was too big and therefore I had to check it in. The reason that I hadn`t already done that, is because I didn`t think it was that necessary. I also thought it`d be great to be able to get off the plane and have “nothing to declare”. But, this man insisted so I followed him. I was glad I didn`t had to pay anything. He was like “you`ve got 15 KGS, you do know that is too much?” and I tried to act “innocent”, haha… The woman behind the counter looked at me in a way which said “poor girl”, because the man looked a little grumpy. He was saying something on German and of course I had no idea what he was saying. I asked them if my baggage would manage to arrive Oslo on time, because I was going to take another flight from Paris. “Yeah, of course”, was the answer I got, so I went on board and arrived Oslo safely. Turned out my baggage was stuck in France. The reason was unknown and I was a liiiittle disappointed. I was so excited to open my baggage and show my family what I had got. Happily the airport was going to drive it to my house the next day. I was SO happy when they came to my house and I saw my suitcase, haha.

✨ On the plane from Paris to Oslo, I was sitting next to this young woman. She seemed very sweet, but it was towards the end that we actually started talking. We were both not able to close our tables, which made us laugh. Turned out she was going to meet her sister in Oslo and lived in Germany. She asked me about a street in the city and I helped her by telling her how to get there. She was very sweet and when we said goodbye, she hugged me, to my surprise. I really hope she had a great time in Norway!

✨ The fact that I got up early today, even though I had today off and I wanted to stay in bed. Not only that, I got ready and went out for a walk! I`ve decided that the days I don`t go out to do anything, I at least have to go out for a walk. It was quite windy today, but getting fresh air every day is so important!

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✨ Going to bed with soft, clean sheets. Little things like that can make you feel so good!

✨ Being able to read books that aren`t part of the syllabus. During the exams, I didn`t read that much. I`m trying to read more books as there are wayyy too many books that I want to read.

✨ Also happy because I`m going to visit the library tomorrow to pick up a book I`ve been wanting to read for some time!

✨ Right now I`m VERY excited about the newest episode of “Baaghi!”. I`m hooked as you perhaps can tell, haha. The episode came out a while ago and I`m going to watch it now.

What have made you happy lately? Share some positivity below!
Hope everyone`s having a lovely day!

THE LAST DAYS IN FRANKFURT

What is there not to miss about Germany? I miss my family and I miss being in their house, but there must be something else. Maybe I miss it this much because of the air there, because of the more chill weather. Maybe I miss it because I don`t live there – if I did, I would`ve had joined an university there and live my life there and not here, in Norway. Maybe it`s because of the cheap prices and how the trains go more often there. Now you might be thinking why someone would miss that. I guess the answer is that we miss everything we don`t have.

Anywho, here are some pictures from the last days I spent in Frankfurt. I stayed in Russelsheim, which is by car only a few minutes away from the airport. IMG_1942IMG_1943

I went to Russelsheim “Stadt” (centrum) two days, once with my female cousin and once with one of my male cousins. It was so fun and I bought some stuff from the different shops here.

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The neighbourhood.

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One of the days I had “aalo ke parathas”. They made me full very quickly, but they were quite tasty! Now I wish I had said yes to eat them the second time my aunt made them, haha…

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An outfit from the day I went out with one of my cousins. Chill clothes because they ain`t got any snow.

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A walk outside, in the evening. Yes to more walks like that.

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The weater was quite sunny one of the days I was there, which I loved! This day we went out to visit a Pakistani family my aunt loves, and I and my cousin wore the same dress…

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… while this is what met me, when I came back in Norway. What a difference.


 

I hope you`ve enjoyed the travel posts on my blog lately. I`m anyways going to miss writing them, but hopefully I`ll get the opportunity to get on a plane soon! Thanks to my family for giving me a great time and thanks Deutschland. I`ll see you before you know it.

WHAT A YEAR IT HAS BEEN

2017. I don`t exactly know whether this year has lived up to my expectations or not, but I`ve definitely become wiser. Wiser because of pain, because of people. I`ve had days where I`ve just thought “humans are weird, I don`t want to surround myself with them.” I`ve went home and stayed in my room for hours those days, because sometimes I really do get fed up by humans. I don`t understand everything they do, they don`t always make sense. But it hasn`t stayed that way, I like humans even though I don`t always get them.

I remember being in a birthday event, while thinking “why do we do so much, when all of us are going to die?” I have no answers that are good enough and there and then these thoughts made me feel lost. I find it odd and crazy how I am here today and might not be here tomorrow. How there have been living millions of people before me, how the world hasn`t always been like this. Too much thinking. I`ve always believed that happiness comes from the inside and I believe we rule our minds, but this year I`ve forreal learned how doing that isn`t always that easy. Convincing your mind isn`t always easy, even though it`s your own mind. I`ve been frustrated when I`ve known better, but not be able to do much about it. It`s so easy to get caught up in your own thoughts, to end up in a circle of not so good thoughts. God knows how I ended up this way, but I`m sure most end up like that at one point in life.

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Despite everything, I`m proud of myself. I`ve been told sad things throughout the year, that have hurted me. Some have wanted me to give up, to not do the things I do but I`m not sorry for being who I am. It`s so easy to think you`re doing something wrong, especially when people you love and care so much about try to convince you, but how can a person be wrong for trying to be themselves? There`s been way too much overthinking the past months, but I`ve kept holding on to what I believe in and I`m still dreaming. That`s something to be proud of. No matter what happens in your life, never give up, because after the darkness comes the light. Even the darkest hour has 60 minutes, even the darkest minute has 60 seconds. Life might consist of bad memories and painful moments, but life can be joyful and exciting too.

I managed to make some of my dreams come true this year. After so many years, I finally visited the Anne Frank House. Finally. I can`t describe the happiness I was feeling while I was in the beautiful and historical city, And standing in front of the Museum after seeing so many pictures and videos was amazing. The waiting was worth it, even though it sometimes felt like I wasn`t going to make it anytime soon. I can`t wait to make it back to the city one day. Who knows, I might be on the way during 2018.

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This year has been unpredictable. Many times I told people when they asked me how I`m doing that “life`s up and down, but that`s just how it is, I guess.” This year`s been up and down too, but maybe that`s just how it`s supposed to be too. I`ve been hurting, I`ve been crying, I`ve had moments where my mind`s almost been completely blurry and I`ve thought “is everything ever going to be okay again?”, I`ve been laughing, I`ve been thinking, I`ve been growing, I`ve been aging and I`ve been learning. I`ve been scared of death, but I`ve also been in Amsterdam and felt how fantastic life can be to you. I`ve been missing my grandmother on my birthday, but she still exists in my heart. It can be easy to remember the negative things and focus too much on them, but life`s about the small moments too.

It`s soon 2018 and unlike many, I don`t really have any resolutions. Why do we think we have to begin tomorrow? Begin now.  I`m going to keep learning, keep making mistakes, keep growing up, keep having wise conversations and keep being myself. Also.. I`m going to turn 21. Let`s not think about that for now, haha. Happy New Years, guys. Thanks for all the love and support, I really appreciate it. 💖 A even bigger thank you to everyone who`s seen me for who I am and been there for me, ever since the beginning. Here`s to 2018.

I AM GOING TO GERMANY!

My brother came home yesterday, saying he`s going to Amsterdam. In fact, he arrived just a while ago. Of course I was jealous and wasn`t exactly able to be quiet, while he was getting ready. My mum decided to send me somewhere too, so I`m off to visit my family in Germany right after New Years. Thank you so much, mum, for spending your money on buying another ticket for me.  ♥

Pictures from the times I`ve been there.

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I`m having my first lecture the 9th January, but since I don`t have any other classes that week I thought it`d be okay to show up at the university the week after. I can hardly believe I`m finally getting the chance to travel again. I`m excited to meet my family, eat food, do some shopping and just chill before another semester kicks off. 🙂

WAYS TO GET HAPPIER

We all go through different phases in life. Sometimes things get darker and it might seem like you`re never going to be happy again. It`s easy to get caught up in your own mind and think the worst, so here are my advices on how to be happier. You don`t have to do the big things to live a better life. 🙂DSC_2607


♥ Drink enough water and eat healthy food. That being said, it`s completely okay to eat candy, chocolate and anything else you feel like eating, once in a while! Balance is the key.

♥ Exercise. I`m not the best person to be talking about this, but many have made it seem like you need to go out for runs and visit a gym two or three times a week in order to be in a good shape. BUT walks are so underestimated – they do you so good, just go out and get some fresh air.

♥Be grateful. Write down three (or more, that`s even better!) things every night, which you are thankful for. Even if you feel like you have nothing to be thankful for (which can`t be thaaaaat true), force yourself to focus on the small things and write something down. It`ll make you more positive and appreciate things more.

♥ Spend time with people who make you feel good and accept you for who you are.

♥ Sleep enough. I once read that you should get between 6,5-7,5 hours sleep every night.

♥ Accept that what`s past, is past. You can`t change what happened, but you can choose to learn from the past, not make the same mistakes and become a better person.

♥ Read books or watch movies. I always feel inspired after finishing a book or a movie and want to become a better person. Yesterday I watched a movie called “My Dog Skip” – first I was a liiiittle sceptical, but I`m so glad I watched it! It`s about loyalty and love and I learned so much. So, visit the library and find a book you think you`ll find interesting, or find a movie online of a genre you enjoy.

♥ You`re the architecture of your own destruction. Quotes mean different things to different people, but to me it`s the reminder that I can destroy myself, if that`s what I want. With “destroy” I mean it literally. It`s easy to get caught up in your own thoughts and let negative thoughts guide you, or your own heart can become your villain. You can do things that will destroy your life. Don`t let the sadness, regret and pain control your life.

♥ Don`t hate anyone. It won`t really get you anywhere. It`s the same with grudges. Being angry/spending negative energy on hating is energy (and time) you could spend on things that actually will get you somewhere.

♥ You might be going through a really hard phase now, you might be thinking it`s never going to be okay again. The truth is: it will. What`s happening now will end one day. Try to use the things that make or used to make you sad as a strength. Use them to do great things. Inspire people who today are where you once used to be,

♥ Be you. I bet you`ve heard that perhaps a million times before, but it`s so true and it`s maybe the past few years I`ve realised how important this is. Be you and I`ll be me. You could try your very best to be someone you`re not, but you`ll never be really happy. Appreciate yourself, understand that there`s only one of you. Now THAT is something to be proud about. There`s only one you, so you better make the best out of it.